Tag Archives: China

Olympinsomnia

We all are losing sleep watching the Beijing 2008 Olympics. With coverage all night long, who can shut their eyes during an exciting team table tennis match? And of course we all watched Michael Phelps break every world record and win 8 gold medals, becoming the best Olympian EVER.

And why would you miss the women’s all-around gymnastic finals, wondering if Nastia Liukin or Shawn Johnson was going to get the gold?

America is a group of insomniacs lately. Dr. Nancy Snyderman has some tips for fellow Olympaholics:

1. Stay hydrated.

2. Tell yourself you only need four hours of sleep – really.

3. Wear sunglasses to hide red eyes.

4. Crank up your iPod and listen to anything Michael Phelps does.

5. Skip work (you’re never going to see an Olympics like this again anyway.)

But remember. If you do fall asleep, you may dream about the beautiful male swimmers. Aaron Peirsol may join me in dreamland any time.

Until tomorrow, signing off.

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Sexy McDonalds

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In today’s world, advertisers know one thing is constant — sex sells. In fact, this idea isn’t cocacola ad new. Old Coca-cola ads showed beautiful, sexy women, in their bathing suits, drinking coke at the beach. This advertising got the point across: sexy people drink coke.

Today, the advertising industry is a multi-billion dollar corporation. If you want people to buy your products, you don’t ask them to, you TELL them to. And the advertising isn’t just on the extra pages of ads in a magazine or during the commercials of your favorite show. Magazine photo shoots and articles are always pushing a products or outfit or gadget. And television shows and even movies, are dropping label names, brand name and places to be like rain falls in Seattle. One of the most popular corporations is no stranger to pushing their product.

McDonald’s has had numerous advertising campaigns throughout the years with a series of catchy slogans. The slogans below are some of the most popular over the past two decades:

1992: What you want is what you get.

1993: Do you believe in magic?

1995: Have you had your break today?

1997: Did somebody say McDonalds?

1990: McDonald’s – It can happen.

2000: We love to see/make you smile. -and – Put a smile on.

And 2003-present: I’m lovin’ it.

While the United States thinks they are liberal with their advertising, everyone who has been to Europe or Asia knows differently. I remember the first time I was in Europe. I was on a trip with 3 of my girlfriends to London. I was shocked when we turned on the television in the middle of the afternoon and saw nudity in commercials and a sexed up version of Goldilocks.

In 2006, China McDonald’s used the slogan “Beef is sexy.” I supposed these ads were meant to show how sexy McDonald’s hamburgers are. But lets get real. When have you gone out to eat and said to yourself “Eating this hamburger makes me feel sexy.”? Yeah, that’s what I thought. While the taste of beef is delicious, ordering a fillet mignon makes me feel sexier than eating a greasy burger.

Another gripe I have with this advertising is how un-creative it is. Micky D’s, you are NOT the first people to make the connection between beef and sex. The 1980’s ad campaign for red meat already did that with the slogan “Where’s the beef?” which did not leave me feeling turned on in the slightest. Even certain members of the male population have equated their, um, male member with this favorite of all red meats.

However, in recent events, Japan has taken sexy beef mcdonaldsto a WHOLE NEW LEVEL.

At the end of April, a porn film crew was arrested at a McDonald’s in Saitama Prefecture. The story is that the director and three “actors” just strolled in and just started filming in the restaurant. A suspicious customer followed them to their corner and then called the cops. The cops arrested the foursome for indecent exposure and obstruction of business.

David Letterman came out with a hilarious Top Ten to comment on the, er, event.

TOP TEN QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF BEFORE HAVING SEX IN A McDONALD’S

10 Should I take her some place more romantic like Applebee’s?

9 Am I going to get “The McClap?”

8 Should we just stay in the car and have sex in the drive-thru?

7 The rats won’t mind, will they?

6 Would she rather have had a ‘Whopper’?

5 Is this what my dad meant when he said, “Go get a job at McDonald’s”?

4 Should I add fries and a soda for an extra 99 cents?

3 Can I tell my wife I was just getting a ‘Happy Meal’?

2 Should i see a psychiatrist?

1 Is this going to hurt my wife’s presidential campaign?

Well, all I can say is that sex still sells. Writing this blog has made me want a Quarter Pounder with cheese and some fries. Despite a health hazard, any news is good news for McDonald’s. I’d say that any management team deserves praise for giving the people what they want.

Especially when it’s sex.

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