Monthly Archives: June 2008

Wanna-Be Opera Singer

I don’t know if I have disclosed this information about myself in previous blogs, but I am an opera singer. No, I haven’t “made it” yet. I am still young and am working on perfecting and improving upon my talents. It kills me that there are people out there who tour and think they can sing opera. Below is a clip from Sarah Brightman’s Las Vegas “Harem” tour. She beings singing Cavalli’s “Ebben” from La Wally. This is a gorgeous aria. I fell in love with it the first time I heard it. But first of all, opera should not be sung with a microphone, secondly, it should not be excerpted into pop songs, and ABOVE ALL, Sarah Brightman should NOT and NEVER AGAIN attempt to sing opera. And a pitiful attempt at it. However, this video is freaking hilarious! So, enjoy!

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Filed under Music Rant, YouTube Rave

Pregnancy Pact

I am confused by teenagers today. I know everyone wants to fit in, but a group of Boston high schoolers have gone too far. June

BOSTON: At least 17 high school students, many aged 16 and under, are pregnant after apparently making a pact.

Officials in the Massachusetts city of Gloucester said nearly half of those who became pregnant appeared to have entered into an agreement to have their babies together over the year.

“Some girls seemed more upset when they weren’t pregnant than when they were,” Joseph Sullivan, the principal of Gloucester High School, told Time magazine.

A school health clinic became suspicious after seeing a surge in girls seeking pregnancy tests.

Authorities may pursue statutory rape charges against some of the men involved. Some are in their mid-20s, including one man who appeared to be homeless. Others were boys in the school.

In Massachusetts it is a crime to have sex with anyone under the age of 16.

“We’re at the very early stages of wrestling with the complexities of this problem,” Carolyn Kirk, the Mayor of the port city about 50 kilometres north-east of Boston, said.

“But we also have to think about the boys. Some … could have their lives changed. They could be in serious, serious trouble even if it was consensual because of their age – not from what the city could do but from what the girls’ families could do.”

The school forbids the distribution of condoms and other contraception without parental consent – a rule that prompted the school’s doctor and nurse to resign in protest in May.

“But even if we had contraceptives, that pact shows that if they want to get pregnant, they will get pregnant.

“Whether we distribute contraceptives is irrelevant,” Greg Verga, chairman of the Gloucester School Committee, said.

He also said the men should at least be held responsible for financial support, “if not put in jail for statutory rape as the mayor has suggested”.

Teenage pregnancies in the US are showing signs of rising after declining from 1991 to 2005.

Birth rates for girls aged 15 to 17 rose by 3 per cent in 2006, the first increase since 1991, preliminary data from the National Centre for Health Statistics said.

While these young girls prepare for motherhood, I can reflect upon my high school days when the most I had to worry about was who to go to the school dance with, how I could sneak alcohol from my parent’s liquor supply, and what to do on the weekend with which group of friends. Sadly, because they wanted to fit in, these girls will be staying home with morning sickness and say goodbye to their childhood and adolescence the moment that tiny child leaves their womb. I don’t envy their position, nor their stupidity.

For more on this story check out the following sites:

http://www.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1815845,00.html

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/06/20/pregnancy.pact.ap/index.html

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25272678/

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Christian the Lion

I received this video from my dad. I think it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. But don’t take my word for it. Watch it yourself. Grab tissues.

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8th Grade Flashback

I just took a look through my 8th grade year book. It was hilarious to see how we all have changed. Even though I am not friends with most of the people in there, I am still in touch with many of them through Facebook and mutual friends. Two of my close friends have just gotten engaged, and one is married with twins! It’s crazy how quickly the years have gone by.

yearbook

Looking back at the faces that used to be familiar, I don’t see a bunch of strangers, but children from the past. I can remember specific inside jokes, who my best friends were, who was in class with me and what teachers I had that year. But those people are gone forever. They have become the young adults that we are today. Yearning for success and happiness, we are trying to achieve more than we ever thought was possible. Money, family, a career and good friends. At the time the fights we had were so huge, the parts I played in school plays were unforgettable, and we were all going to be friends forever. Many of those memories have faded, but I feel so fortunate to look back at this book and see how far I have come, what friends I have kept, and how happy I am today.

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Happy Birthday, Mom!

Today is my Mom’s birthday! Past 50 and still looking gorgeous. monkey In honor of one of the most extraordinary women I know, here is a recap of what has happened in past years on this day:

JUNE 18th

  • 1429 – French forces under the leadership of Joan of Arc defeat the main English army under Sir John Fastolf at the Battle of Patay. This turns the tide of the Hundred Years’ War.
  • 1767 – Samuel Wallis, an English sea captain, sights Tahiti and is considered the first European to reach the island.
  • 1778 – American Revolutionary War: British troops abandon Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
  • 1812War of 1812: the U.S. Congress declares war on the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland.
  • 1873 – Susan B. Anthony is fined $100 for attempting to vote in the 1872 presidential election.
  • 1953 – The Republic of Egypt is declared and the monarchy is abolished.
  • 1981 – The AIDS epidemic is formally recognized by medical professionals in San Francisco, California.
  • 1983 – Space Shuttle program: STS-7, Astronaut Sally Ride becomes the first American woman in space.

My mom shares her birthday with the following famous people:

Roger Ebert, Paul McCartney, Isabella Rossellini, Carol Kane, Nathan Morris of Boys II Men, and Blake Shelton.

Not too shabby for the 169th day of the year (170th in leap years!)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM! I LOVE YOU!

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And you thought YOU were a BADASS…

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Dear Boy… Love, Crazy Bitch

One of my friends is dating a guy who received this note in the form of an email from an ex-girlfriend. All I have to say, is that anything you write and email at 4am should not be sent. The following is a perfect example why.

First of all I’m not asking for anything, hinting at or alluding to anything with this message, or at least I’m going to make a sincere attempt not to.. I’m just sending it because I really miss you alot, have been ever since I broke up with you, and just realized some important things tonight because I missed you so much that I went back and reread every message you ever sent me on facebook. well, maybe theyre not that important…they seemed that way to me.. First of all, I don’t know why I never threatened you with death if you were to ever stop sending me those long rambling messages that I absolutely Loved getting. That was dumb of me. Those used to make me soo happy. Second of all, …..ok im about to commit the biggest sin, so be ready to forgive me and perhaps pretend like you never read this if i end up sounding completely off my rocker…which i most likely will….its just that ive sat here for 20 minutes thinking about saying it, so at this point i might as well….whatever..ive already made more thana complete fool of myself where youre concerned more times than i can count, so whats one more time, right… ok… oh, please dont compare me to the crazy ex, beause i dont want to be that, although i kind of technically already am, just by definition… alright. good…ive now stalled for another 10 minutes. brilliant, as its not gonna make a bit of difference when you go to read it how much time i spent thinking in between sentences. k. i never wanted to break up with you, and ive regretted it every single day since i did… i was a complete idiot and i dont really know what spurred me to do it.. i think i was in a bad place with stress and depression, and i wanted something to change and wanted to feel in control of some situation in my life… i know the whole time i was at your house that day i was wishing that you would save me from my idiotic self and tell me that i was being stupid, but you didnt, so i figured maybe it was better off this way… except that there hasnt really been a single moment since then that ive actually thought that… the things i said about the sex thing werent really true.. i mean, i suppose on some level they had to be, and some of them were, in part, i guess, but mostly i was so angry and upset with myself that i just kind of wrote bullshit. i did want to have sex with you, and some of those reasons were probably legitimate, or somewhat so anyways, but really i wanted to have sex with you simply because i really wanted to have sex. with you. because every time i see you i realize more and more what an idiot i am, because i love you. fuck. yes, i just said that. if i have crossed the line to crazy ex-dom please know that at least i wont text you 50 times a day. i wanted to say that back in december sometime, but i didnt want to be…i dont know… something. so i decided to wait and take cues from you and be a stupid ho. i didnt want to fuck things up. and then i ended up getting frustrated and being stupid and fucking it all up anyway. good job ashley. damn it, i love you. i love the way you smell, and the way you feel.. i love the sound of your voice and those beautiful eyes…. i love that you take care of me all the time, and i love talking with you… and goddamn it, even ben has noticed that i cant stop checking you out every time youre not looking at me when were at work. …..fuck, now ive really gone and fucked myself, cuz ill probably have to go work in the balcony from now on so i dont get a chance to ever look you in the eye again and die from embarrassment. but i cant help it…and i hate it when you touch me, because it is Torture. i am way too attracted to you..it sucks. all i want is to be with you…wrapped up in you forever. im probably being really stupid right now…this message is like, every guys worst nightmare to receive… well if ive freaked you out or crossed that horrible line i apologize most profusely…i dont think id even send this right now except that its officially been at least an hour and a half since i started writing it, so it kinda seems like i might as well not have wasted that time doing nothing….. please dont hate me… im sorry.. i just decided to finally be honest and get it all off my back so i dont have to spend so much time wondering what would happen if i said these things. yay, now i just have to live with the mortification of knowing i already did.

Well, ill be back in town on wednesday…. Assuming i can pull myself together enough to face you, perhaps youd like to get the pizza we never got to get tonight… …or perhaps not..if its perhaps not maybe just dont bother to say so,and it might save some embarrassment… im going to bed before i say anything else ridiculous. sorry, again. good night.

I was going to go through adding my own comments, but it’s hilarious enough on it’s own. So let this be the “What Not To Say To An Ex” example. And feel free to share this with friends. Because it’s a classic.

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Filed under Email Rave, Ex Rant